


The Lost Soulmarks

by Takara_Phoenix



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alpha Magnus, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Anal, Arranged Marriage, Bottom Jace, Explicit Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, Jace Feels, Knotting, Lots of Hurt, Lydia and Alec are bros, Lydia is a Good Bro, M/M, Mating, Multi, Omega Alec, Omega Jace, Oral, Pack Alpha Magnus, Polyamory, Shounen-ai, Slash, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Threesome - M/M/M, Top Alec, Top Magnus, Use Your Words, Valentine's A+ Parenting, aka: Izzy taking over Alec's place in that wedding, pack as family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 04:36:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11547603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Takara_Phoenix/pseuds/Takara_Phoenix
Summary: Soulmate AU with animals as representatives of the souls. Those with more than their own soul-representing animal on their skin have one or more soulmates wating for them. They also present as either an alpha or an omega, while those who only bear their own soul-animal are called betas.In this world, Jace was one of the few with more than one mate mark. He used to have two. At least before Valentine, with his insane experiments, removed Jace's soulmarks. Now he appears to be just a beta.Valentine used to tell him that soulmates would make him weak. That he was already weak and that his soulmates would be better off without him. When Jace watches how Alec first meets Magnus and the two fall into a beautiful, easy relationship, Jace knows his father was right. They are better off without him.Magnus and Alec all the while think that their third is dead...





	The Lost Soulmarks

Malace || Shadowhunters || Malace || The Lost Soulmarks || Malace || Shadowhunters || Malace

Title: The Lost Soulmarks – And How They Were Found Again

Fandom: Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments

Disclaimer: All rights to the Shadowhunters reserved to Ed Decter, the books the Shadowhunters is based off and its characters belong to Cassandra Clare. This fanfiction on the other hand is entirely mine. No money is made with this, though reviews are more than welcomed.

Warnings: shounen-ai, polyamory (threesome), soulmates, ABO-verse, arranged marriage/mating, mating, explicit intercourse, anal, oral, knotting, lots of hurt/comfort, shoujo-ai, hetero

Main Pairing: Magnus/Alec/Jace

Side Pairings: Lydia/Isabelle, Simon/Clary, Maryse/Robert

Shadowhunters Characters: Jonathan Christopher 'Jace' Wayland, Magnus Bane, Alexander Gideon 'Alec' Lightwood, Isabelle Sophia 'Izzy' Lightwood, Clarissa Adele 'Clary' Fray, Simon Lewis, Lydia Branwell, Maxwell Joseph 'Max' Lightwood, Maryse Lightwood, Robert Lightwood

Summary: Every person has a soul animal by birth, nestled above their hearts. Many have one or more additional marks, the soul animals of their soulmates. Among those with soulmates are alphas and omegas, while those without mates are called betas.

Jace is one of the few who had more than one mate mark. He used to have two. At least until his father, always eager to experiment with magic and with his son, had a warlock use forbidden magic to remove Jace's mate marks, because Jace was finding too much comfort in them, not to mention that his omega nature made him weak. Over and over, Jace has to hear that his mates would be better off without him.

By the time Jace gets to watch how Alec meets Magnus and falls into an easy relationship with the warlock, Jace starts to believe that his father was right and his mates were better off without him...

**The Lost Soulmarks**

_And How They Were Found Again_

Every baby was born with their soul animal right above their heart. An animal that symbolized the person's soul, an animal meant to guard said heart. Yet guarding the heart was not the only purpose of the soul animals. For many, the soul animal was also the key to finding their soulmates.

Not every person had a soulmate, there were so many people only born with their own soul animal on their skin. But those lucky enough to have soulmates, they also bore the soul animals of their soulmates at some place on their body. Those additional animals were called soulmarks.

Jonathan Christopher Wayland was one of the children lucky enough to have not just one soulmark but two. He wore them both with pride and cherished and loved them both so very, very much.

His own soul animal was a Golden Retriever pup, playfully laying on his back as though it was demanding cuddles. Jace loved his pup, because it was warm and always there for him.

But he loved the marks of his mates even more, because they protected his pup.

On his left hip, curling around his hipbone, was a beautiful snow owl. The owl had piercing, serious, hazel eyes, feathers puffed up and wings flared wide as though the owl was ready to attack whoever dared to come close to Jace and his soul pup. The owl was protective and strong and clever. Jace didn't know why, but he just _knew_ that. He knew it, deep down.

Curled on top of Jace's right hip was a gorgeous black panther. It looked as though it was lazily laying on Jace's hipbone, one paw curled up close to its muzzle as the panther was cleaning said paw. It looked lazy, but when looking closely, one could see the sharp claws on the paw and the sharp fangs poking out where the panther's mouth was open while licking its paw. As though it was subtly showing off how dangerous and deadly it truly could be if someone were to hurt those close to it. Not to mention, the panther had amazing amber-golden eyes that always seemed to follow Jace whenever the blonde was looking at his soulmarks in the mirror. Like the panther was always watching out for him that way, always silently demanding attention.

Whenever things got too hard for Jace, when the punishments for failure hurt too much, when the words about how useless Jace was were biting too sharply, he could _feel_ them. It sounded crazy, Jace knew that, but he could. It felt as though the soft feathers of his snow owl's wings were gently, soothingly caressing Jace. Jace could hear the low, soothing purr of his panther, trying to lull him back to sleep whenever Jace had a nightmare.

They gave him hope. Hope that, if he worked hard enough and obeyed his father and trained more, he could one day be strong and good enough that his mates would be proud of him and love him. Hope that, one day, he would find his mates and find happiness.

Alas, Jonathan Christopher Wayland was not meant to be happy – and he should have known that.

"This is for your own good, Jonathan", had his father said as he dragged Jace off to the basement. "They make you _weak_. You _cling_ onto them, it's pathetic. To be strong, you need to severe that tie."

"N—No! No, father, please, _please_ don't take them away from me", had Jace sobbed desperately.

A warlock had been waiting in the basement, whispering words of pleading protest about forbidden magic. Michael Wayland wouldn't hear them. The pain had been blinding and deafening and suffocating. Jace was left dizzy with pain as he saw his soulmarks for the last time, magically transported from his skin onto a parchment of leather.

That night, as Jace fell asleep while crying, there was no gentle touch of wings, no soothing purr.

/That Night, Lightwood Residence\

Little Alexander Lightwood woke up with a scream and with tears running down his face as he wrapped his arms tightly around his own body. It hurt. Hurt, hurt, hurt. Why did his puppy hurt?!

Sadly, he didn't get to see his marks too often. They were set on his shoulder-blades. Sometimes, Alec would stand in front of the mirror, craning his neck as best as possible to look at his gorgeous, amazing black panther and his cute, adorable Golden Retriever.

He was still young, he was only eight, so he didn't _quite_ understand how the bond worked, but he knew that it was there. He could feel them. The panther was very often very sad and lonely and Alec just wanted to hug his panther and caress his fur until he could purr and fall asleep peacefully. The puppy was very often in pain. Alec could feel it, feel a phantom of the pain. Someone was hurting his puppy and Alec hated it and he just wanted to wrap himself around his puppy and shield him from all pain. But this? This was more excruciating than ever before.

And then it was gone.

The pain was gone, completely. Alec sat on his bed, confused, trying to reach out for his puppy.

"Alec...? Did you have a bad dream?", asked a soft, little voice.

Shaking his head, Alec turned toward his door where his baby sister was standing, clutching a fluffy yellow canary plush toy. She loved that one, it was her total favorite, above all dolls and teddies she loved this in particular. Her bare feet patted over to his bed and she carefully climbed up.

"I... I dunno", whispered Alec, shaking his head again.

"Is okay, big brother", hummed Isabelle, hugging her big brother tightly in comfort.

Alec really, really, _really_ hoped she was right, because something felt off. So very, very, _very_ off.

/That Night, High Warlock Residence in Brooklyn\

The shattering of the wine-glass on the floor echoed through the empty loft. The wine spilled until it reached the rug and soaked it like fresh blood tainting snow. Normally, Magnus Bane would be fussing and cussing about the mess even as and after he magically cleaned it up.

Yet the growing stain didn't even register on Magnus' mind as his eyes were unfocused. He tried breathing, but it didn't seem to work. His hand was clawed into the expensive fabric of his shirt, just left of his heart. The spike of pain had been cruel, but not too surprising at first.

Magnus' precious puppy was often in pain. And as much as it hurt Magnus – not just through the bond, but also solemnly because he knew his soulmate was in pain – it was also a sort of relief to the warlock, regardless of how horrible that may sound. Because it meant he _had_ a soulmate.

For so many centuries, Magnus had carried two soulmarks. Two fascinating soulmarks. A golden puppy, playful and gentle looking, and a fiercely fluffed-up white owl, dangerous and guarded.

They were empty. Magnus had heard, over the centuries, from others with soulmates how they could feel through the mark. Feel the presence of their soulmates, their pain but also their comfort if one was in pain themselves. Magnus had never felt anything. They were just beautiful, colorful pictures on his skin and nothing more. For centuries, he had thought he was somehow broken. That even his soulmates didn't care about him, shared no comfort with him.

Until. Until they were just _there_. The snow owl was first and it quite literally felt as though it came alive. And then it was just there. The golden puppy took two more years before it too started to feel warm and present and strong. Each time, Magnus had been overwhelmed with tears of relief.

It hadn't been him. The bond hadn't been empty because of Magnus, but because his mates hadn't been born yet. But now they were. Now they were there and Magnus would actually get the chance to meet them. For weeks after the snow owl came alive, Magnus had been buzzing with excitement.

He had been tempted to track his mates down, but he knew it was a bad idea. If they weren't warlocks, weren't immortals, then they would stop aging once they actually met, because soulmates were for life. For _his_ life. The only way to achieve immortality, even as a mortal being, was to have a soulbond with an immortal. Not to mention, Magnus thought it might just be a bit awkward if he were to hover around and change his soulmates' diapers, watching their childhood until they were off-age and he could make them his lovers. No. No, truly not. Magnus forced himself to be patient. He had waited so many centuries, he could wait eighteen more years. It was nothing, really.

Only that it was _everything_. His snow owl was often tense and strained and Magnus wanted to chide them gently, tell his mate that they were perfectly fine and should enjoy their childhood instead of shouldering so much responsibility themselves. His golden puppy however, he was very often in pain. It wasn't hard for Magnus to guess that his puppy was being abused at home. Magnus tried to comfort them both, wished he would be able to actually help them.

And now he would never get a chance to comfort his puppy. Never even get to meet them.

The bond had gone cold. Stale. Empty. It felt as it had felt for centuries. Like his puppy wasn't _alive_. There really was only one explanation and Magnus knew it. His soulmate had died. Only a child and yet the poor thing had died. Most likely at the hands of whatever abusive parent they had.

Never before had Magnus felt that much despair and rage at the same time. How dare someone had taken his soulmate from him before he would ever get to meet them. Yet he was helpless. There was nothing he could do. Nothing but reach out for his snow owl with as much warmth and comfort as he could, because while he was old and experienced and knew what had happened, his little owl must be in so much pain and must be so confused by what was happening.

Magnus vowed to himself that he would find his snow owl and protect them, as best as he could, with his very life. He would love and cherish his snow owl not just for himself, but also for their lost puppy. He would try and fill the void left by their third.

/break\

Living with the Lightwoods was strange. It took Jace about a year to even get _used_ to how different it was from living with his father. He kept expecting punishments for imperfection and failure. He was startled and confused by the gentle, loving nature of the family. Well, at least of the three siblings and sometimes, whenever the parents were even around, from Robert. Though Maryse also showed a lot of affection for Jace and Alec, which only confused Jace even _more_. She didn't have it for her own daughter, not so much at least. Why would she care about him then?

Alec and Izzy were so warm and welcoming and there. For the first time in his life, Jace felt actually taken care of, because the three of them, they started to take care of each other.

So the first time Jace and Alec went to the common showers together after long training, months into Jace's stay with the Lightwoods, it nearly gave Jace whiplash to see Alec's soul animal.

Alec struggled with his black shirt and dumped it on the ground, leaving his torso bare. And there, at the center of it, sat a beautiful, fierce snow owl, puffed up and wings spread. All Jace could think was that this was _his_ snow owl. It belonged to him. Why was it on Alec? But then Alec turned his back on Jace to get a towel and Jace didn't know how to compute, because on Alec's right shoulder-blade sat no other but Jace's puppy – the only mark he still carried, his now so lonely and sad puppy – and on Alec's left shoulder-blade lounged the gorgeous black panther. Those amber-golden eyes seemed to follow Jace as transfixed as they used to when they stared up at him from his own hip.

Jace nearly choked on the tears building up and he rushed into a shower-stall so the running water could hide his tears before Alec could see them. He took the probably longest shower of his life, trying to sort his thoughts, trying to figure out what to do now.

He had been glamouring his own soul animal ever since his father had taken his soulmarks from him. It was pure embarrassment and also the need to protect himself, in a way. If no one saw his puppy, no one would be able to also take that from him. And no one would be able to identify him as their soulmate. As a young child, he had been looking forward to finding his soulmates, anticipating it with so much eagerness, but after his marks had been taken away? How could he?

He had no _proof_ that he was truly theirs. He only had his own soul animal. How was he supposed to explain this? Not to mention, he had no connection to them anymore. The entire point of soulmates was the bond between their souls. Jace remembered, with longing and sadness, how his snow owl and his black panther used to console him when he truly needed it. That had stopped when the marks had been taken away from him. He had no connection to them anymore. Heck, he had been _living_ with one of his soulmates for ten months now and he hadn't even known, even though soulmates were supposed to just realize it the moment they first looked at each other.

Jace wasn't meant to be Alec's anymore. He was broken. He didn't have Alec's mark. He didn't deserve soulmates. He shouldn't _want_ soulmates. His father had taught him, in many long, hard lessons, that soulmates made someone weak. They were a weakness, a leverage that could be used against him. They'd make him love, soften him up. He needed to be strong though and he couldn't be with soulmates. Not to mention, he was _unnecessary_.

Humans were classified into three different categories. Those without a soulmark were called betas, easy-going and simple. No complicated 'you have this destined person who you have to track down to find happiness', they just got together with whoever they wanted. But those with soulmarks? They were either alphas or omegas. Jace knew he used to be an omega – he didn't think he was anymore, he smelt like beta now that he didn't have his marks anymore. And Alec? Alec was an omega too, Jace could smell it. Which meant their black panther was an alpha. And why would an alpha need _two_ omegas? No, no, Alec would be perfectly happy with their alpha.

Triads were very rare, those with more than two soulmarks were even rarer. And even though soulmates were something destined, something no society could deny, those with multiple soulmarks were still frowned upon. One should only have one soulmate. An alpha should have one omega. An omega should have one alpha. That was how it was supposed to be.

So this was better. It was good that Jace was hiding his soul animal and he would just keep doing it, keep posing as a beta and allow Alec to be happy with their—no, with Alec's – alpha. Jace's soulmarks were gone forever, he had no right and no place in this bond.

Besides, he had Izzy, didn't he? The girl had been so blindingly happy to meet Jace, because she had never met another beta personally, aside from their parents. She actually was someone born with only her own soul animal and no soulmarks otherwise.

Jace was happy to be a beta alongside Isabelle. And no one would force him to unglamour his soul animal; it was something entirely uncalled for since the soul animal was the most intimate and private thing someone had to offer. Many people glamoured their soul animals, or even their soulmarks, for privacy reasons. Some also did it for their own safety, because they were popular or famous and had fans getting fake soulmarks to match them. So it would be fine. No one would ever have to see his sad, lonely Golden Retriever, no one would ever have to put one and one together and realize that the very same sad, lonely Golden Retriever was sitting on Alec's right shoulder.

No one had to know and everything would be fine.

/break\

Magnus realized it the moment he laid eyes on Alexander Lightwood for the very first time in the Pandemonium. His snow owl was warming up, it felt as though its wings were fluttering, trying to fly off, fly toward Alec. Magnus felt... not whole, but _wholer_. After all, Alec was only one of his soulmates ( _and he would never get to meet his other_ ).

Alec was wildly distracted at first, it took the Shadowhunter to meet up with Magnus personally, talk to him in private, for Alec to realize. Magnus couldn't quite tell what was going on in Alec's mind, but he realized that losing their third had messed Alec up quite some, because the archer was rather disconnected from their bond, as though he was only being tentative and cautious.

They fell into a relationship easily enough. After all, they were meant to be. Granted, they had to delay their first date quite some thanks to Clary's missing memories, Valentine's sudden return, the increasing death and disappearance of warlocks, how the Lightwoods' hold on the Institute slipped.

Their first date was maybe not exactly the way Magnus had pictured it, but then again, a wedding was a fabulous location for a first date. And it was rather adorable to see Alexander fret.

"Your sister will be fine", assured Magnus gently as he straightened Alec's bow tie.

"It's... not just Isabelle I'm worried about", sighed Alec and rubbed his face.

"Tell me about it. It's what you have a soulmate for", offered Magnus, voice soft and soothing.

"Yeah, I'm worried for Izzy. She's... She's a free spirit and... getting married for the sake of the family name, I don't think it's a good idea, I don't think it will make her happy", started Alec slowly. "But... I also know that it is her decision. I can't force her not to marry Lydia Branwell. And Lydia seems... nice enough. But it's not just... not just her. It's Jace."

Magnus heaved a sigh. As a warlock, he supposed he would never fully understand the parabatai bond, would never be able to fully grasp it to the same extend as a Shadowhunter would. Yet as far as he knew, parabatai were supposed to support each other, be strong for each other. All he had seen so far was Jace turning away from Alec, diving head first into danger without a second's regard of what Alec had to say about it all. Granted, part of Magnus agreed with Jace, because Magnus was fond of Clary Fairchild and Jace's efforts to keep her safe was good, but the way he went about things was just not right, especially not if it didn't include Alec and made Alec upset.

"I'm sorry about the ways he has been going about things, I know it's been affecting you."

"We've never fought like that before", hissed Alec, holding onto Magnus, burying his face in the warlock's chest. "He never shut me out like that. I don't know what it is. I don't... understand it. And I hate not understanding it. Not when it's about Jace. There's always been things about him that I didn't understand, that he kept to himself, but not like that. Never in battle."

Magnus sighed and caressed Alec's back soothingly. "You two should sit together and talk this out, after the wedding. Just you and him and honesty, mh? We still have a long, long way ahead of us in this fight and it won't do if the two of you can't even look at each other."

"You're... right", sighed Alec. "Let's go and get this wedding over with."

Magnus chuckled fondly as he took Alexander's hand, gently kissing his knuckles before they made their way. Clary had very eagerly decorated most of this. The two girls had bonded fast, had become friends. Clary was positively, happily glowing for Isabelle's sake, praying for this to have a happy outcome. So was Magnus. Isabelle seemed like a good person. Then again, so did Lydia so far.

Lydia was an alpha who had lost her omega. Most never recovered from losing their soulmate. Yet the woman was incredibly strong, carrying her yellow canary and the dull mark of her dead mate. And when she had come to the Institute, taking control, Isabelle saw an opportunity. As a beta without soulmarks herself, she was free to pick and chose. She could pick an alpha without a mate, could give Lydia and herself a chance together. To rule the Institute together, to restore the Lightwood name. A chance for Isabelle to maybe finally make her mother _proud_ of her.

"How... nice that you could make it, Magnus", smiled Maryse, very clearly not pleased.

Robert gave a short nod as Alec and Magnus sat down next to the beta couple. Alec slipped his hand into Magnus', squeezing it. He could sense that Magnus was not quite comfortable here and even though matebonds had to be respected in all societies, it was rather clear that the Lightwoods were not quite pleased that one of Alec's soulmates turned out to be a warlock. Another reason why they had nudged Isabelle toward a political marriage, to fix the damage.

"Oh, I wouldn't miss it for the world", smiled Magnus brightly.

/break\

"And you're sure about this, Iz?", asked Jace softly, fastening her wedding dress.

"Yeah. I mean. Lyd is nice and it's not like I'm picky about man or woman", shrugged Isabelle.

Jace sighed and stepped around her to grasp her face and kiss her forehead gently. He loved Isabelle dearly. He also knew that she didn't believe that there was love waiting for her. Many betas thought so, thought that not having soulmarks meant they would never find love. Jace hated that idea.

"Well then, let's get out there and face the bride. Or groom?", grinned Jace teasingly.

"Fuck you, Jace", huffed Isabelle with a small smile.

He grabbed her hand and led her outside. Clary already stood there, waiting with a bright smile. The maid of honor. The lavender dress looked nice on her, even though it clashed a bit with her red hair. Jace's heart squeezed, as it always did when looking at Clary since learning that she was his sister. His sister, who never had to endure Mich—Valentine's lessons. His sister, who still had her soulmark and had her soulmate. His sister, who had grown up with a loving mother. And even though Clary kept trying to reassure Jace that Jocelyn must have thought him dead, as dead as Valentine, that she would be happy to have Jace back, Jace just couldn't help but feel abandoned by Jocelyn. Clary had gotten what Jace always wanted. She had been allowed the happy, carefree childhood, she had been allowed to grow up with her soulmate as her very best friend, the two playfully getting engaged when they were just children, knowing they were meant for each other. Jace tried very hard to be annoyed by Simon, but now that he knew Clary was his sister, now that he knew Simon was kind of technically his brother-in-law, it became hard, because Jace knew Simon made Clary happy and Clary was his sister, so her happiness ranked all the way up there, together with Alec's and Izzy's and Max's. Because those three? They were _his people_. They were his pack.

"You look beautiful, Izzy", smiled Clary happily.

"Thanks", grinned Isabelle, cheeks just a little red, because she couldn't help but be nervous.

Clary offered Jace a smile before Jace turned around to sit down. Maryse and Robert sat together, for once both of them looked proud at Isabelle and Jace knew that was the one thing Isabelle had wanted for too many years now. Next to Robert sat Alec and next to Alec sat Alec's mate.

Jace stuttered in his steps for only the briefest second as he looked at Alec and Magnus, his heart clenching tightly. How had everything gone so horribly wrong, on all ends? Shaking his head, Jace walked over to sit next to Max, who was sitting on Maryse's other side.

"It's weird seeing Izzy in a princess dress like that", whispered Max softly to Jace.

"Yeah", laughed Jace, eyes sparkling as he looked over to their sister. "It kinda is."

But still, Izzy looked absolutely beautiful. The long, white dress with the princess neckline, gems studded along said neckline. Her hair fell in broad curls, two thin braids holding it back, flowers braided into them. She looked downright innocent and pure. So unlike their usual leather-clad Izzy.

Lydia stepped up the aisle, looking just as beautiful in her own white dress. Jace didn't particularly know Lydia, he knew that she and Isabelle had talked and found some form of common ground. He didn't know if it was enough ground to bring forth happiness, but considering his own fucked-up situation, he was probably the last person who should give _anyone_ advise on happiness.

Fuck that, he couldn't even remember what happiness tasted like. There was only this foul, bitter taste on his tongue these days and it just kept getting worse. Learning of Clary had twisted the knife, learning that Michael Wayland was Valentine Morgenstern had driven the knife in even deeper, to feel how his parabatai bond with Alec grew weaker as Alec used it to track him, that alone had felt like a dozen knives stabbing him in the back and somehow, seeing Magnus and Alec together was the worst pain of them all. In the end, it was what had brought most problems.

Sure, Jace had wanted to help Clary from the moment he saw her, but he downright fled into the task of helping her after Magnus and Alec _looked at each other_. Looked at each other in that way only soulmates would or could. The way Alec and Jace _should_ have looked at each other years ago. Like the entire universe fell apart around them, not mattering anymore for two soulmates had finally found each other, finally felt _complete_ for the first time. And when they had run into Magnus, Magnus and Alec looked at each other that way. Magnus got that look from Alec, the look Jace had been silently crying to himself about for many, many months after realizing Alec was supposed to be his soulmate. Magnus didn't even notice Jace. Not really. Not truly. He _dismissed_ Jace.

Because Jace wasn't important. Wasn't _enough_. Wasn't their soulmate anymore.

And it hurt. For so many years, Jace had told himself that it would be fine. Alec and the black panther would be fine. They would be happy together, omega and alpha, the way it should be, the way it was best. They didn't need a second omega, especially not one who wasn't even a _functioning_ omega anymore. He had rationalized this over and over again over the years, yet seeing it... hurt.

The only thing that had ever hurt more was how the soulmarks had left his body for good. Yet it was still the second worst pain, seeing Magnus and Alec enthralled by each other, focused on only each other, feeling their shared soulbond. Not minding Jace, who was just standing by.

So yes. Yes, Jace had been avoiding Alec, yes Jace had preferred to focus on Clary and get as far away from Alec _and Magnus_ as possible, tried not to see those two and how their bond strengthened the longer the two were together. Jace didn't need to be there to see that. He didn't. He needed something to distract him from it all, from the fact that his soulmates had found each other _and truly didn't need him_. Clary and her missing mom had been the perfect distraction.

Until it got messy and Clary's missing mom became Jace's missing mom.

But they found the Mortal Cup. They returned it. They found Jocelyn. They just needed to break the spell, but now that she was safe at the Institute, they would. Isabelle was getting married to Lydia. The Lightwood name would return to the head of the Institute through that marriage.

It was all somehow going to work out. One way or another.

/break\

Obviously, things were _not_ working out. Jace couldn't believe he had ever thought they would. Not for him. Never for him. They found the Book of the White, but before they could even use the spell, Jace had to bargain away his freedom for the safety of his pack.

He had to leave them behind and follow Valentine through the portal, onto a ship where only pain and torture awaited him. And when he had started to think he would never get out of there, because every time he tried to flee, he had been fooled and ended up _punished_ , his sister came to his rescue.

Yet not even being rescued could work in Jace's favor now, could it? Valentine murdered a wolf and it got pinned on Jace, so while still in insane pain, Jace got hunted down by murderous werewolves who really-really wanted him dead. Not to mention, his Alec was _dying_ because of him.

Jace nearly lost Alec. He held Alec as Alec seemed _dead_. That. That had been the worst pain Jace could have pictured. A life-time on that ship with Valentine would have been a fun vacation compared to that split moment of believing Alec to be dead.

But he wasn't. And that was really all Jace needed to know to go willingly to the City of Bones, because his snow owl was safe and he knew that his black panther would protect him. He knew Alec and Magnus would be fine, because they had each other. And somehow, so would Jace, because he _always_ was. Whatever happened to him, he always came out alive somehow, regardless of how much he _hated_ that sometimes. Sometimes, all he really wanted was that a mission just ended him. No more pain. No more feeling useless and worthless and not living up to people's expectations. Like being thrown into the dungeons like a filthy traitor, even though he had endured, he had fought, he had always given his all for the Clave. Yet he just wasn't _enough_.

Even after he was released from prison, he was still not good enough. Shadowhunters he had fought alongside for years looked at him and all they saw was Valentine's son, all they thought was that he was a traitor. Aldertree made it pretty clear that Jace was a failure, had plainly told him to his face that he would do everything to get rid of Jace. And Jace? Jace gave up.

For the very first time in his life did he give up. Because he just couldn't anymore. He was so tired. So, so tired of everything, of everyone always being disappointed in him, of him always being not enough for anyone, for anything. The Institute had turned its back on him, the Clave had turned their backs on him, announcing open season on him and then throwing him into the dungeon.

Fine.

Fine, for once he was done hurting. He was done hurting for the sake of others. So he turned tail. He left the Institute and, _still_ in pain from the torture and feeling lonely and more abandoned than he ever had, he sought out the one place that might just make him feel safe and at home.

He knew it was unhealthy. It was stupid. It would only hurt him a lot, but...

"Do you have a spare room?", he asked as he looked up at both of his – _former_ – soulmates.

/break\

Alec sighed softly as he woke up with his head resting on Magnus' chest. The first thought in his head was that he was happy. Which was strange. He had never been _quite_ happy. Years of pining for Jace, locking his forbidden feelings away because Jace was _supposed_ to be his brother.

Now Alec had at least one of his soulmates. The other lost forever. Alec had cried and screamed and thrown a couple things against a wall when Magnus had told him, had _explained_ it to him. That the dull feeling of the puppy came from their soulmate being dead. It made sense. It made sense, but it hurt so badly. Until now, Alec had hoped it was something different, but now...

Still. Alec tried looking at the positive sides. It was a new approach for him, but why not give it a try? After all, he had _at least_ one of his mates. He had Magnus. His strong, gentle and far too understanding alpha. They had managed to save Jace from Valentine and he got out of the City of Bones and even better yet; he was safe. Because quite frankly, Alec did not trust Aldertree. Not the least bit. And knowing that Jace was now out of Aldertree's reach, was now where Alec knew he was the safest – with Magnus – it eased Alec's mind. Learning that Clary was Jace's sister had helped ease Alec's mind too. He knew he had no right to be jealous, since Jace was a beta and thus had no soulmarks, was not Alec's to be jealous over. That didn't change his feelings though.

Magnus had reasoned that maybe Alec's heart was trying to compensate for the vacuum left by their soulmate's death. Another thing that made Magnus perfect, because the warlock understood and tried to reason, tried to help Alec, instead of being jealous or anything. No, instead, Magnus had taken Jace in, given him a roof over his head and accepted Jace.

"Good morning, darling", whispered Magnus softly, kissing the top of Alec's head.

Alec hummed softly, tilting his head up to get a proper kiss. His hand was still resting on the left side of Magnus' chest, nearly possessively covering the Golden Retriever on it. Magnus reached up to lay a hand atop of Alec's, squeezing. It was hard not to long for the what-if of having their third with them. Alec gently deepened the kiss, fingers digging into Magnus' skin some.

"We should probably get up. Your sister and her mate wanted to come over for breakfast. And I would prefer if we had... breakfast ready _before_ Isabelle enters my kitchen", suggested Magnus.

"Hng. Good idea", sighed Alec in defeat as he got out of the bed.

The loft was slowly growing a bit crowded, but Alec could see that Magnus didn't mind it; if anything, the alpha enjoyed it. He was Alpha to his own little pack by now. A strange, colorful pack, but also a loyal one. It had already started to form slowly during their hunt for the Mortal Cup, yet now that they were searching for the Soul Sword, it had truly strengthened their pack's bonds.

Alec had been the first one to move into the loft, because Magnus was his mate and especially during the times of war, Alec's omega nature really sought out the safety and warmth of his alpha. It was only natural for soulmates to live together. It helped ease his mind, especially now that Aldertree had taken control of the Institute. The Institute didn't feel _safe_ anymore. The loft did.

Jace had been the second one to move into the loft, standing in front of the door like a lost puppy and when Alec turned pleading eyes on Magnus, the alpha had no other option than to cave. Though Alec was pretty sure that Magnus hadn't just agreed for the sake of Alec. After all, they _had_ a slowly forming bond of pack and as the pack Alpha, Magnus would not abandon a helpless pack-member.

After Jace came Simon, because the vampire didn't know where to go, too afraid to hurt his family.

It only took days before Clary followed. Not just for the sake of her soulmate Simon, but also for the sake of her brother. With her mother dead and Jace living at the loft, she had no reason to live in the Institute, she also kind of didn't have a _home_ anymore since the Fray household had been wrecked by demons. And Magnus, once again, opened his doors for a member of his pack.

Literally the only members of their pack not living with them were Isabelle and Lydia. Alec mused that the arranged marriage between Isabelle and Lydia had happened at the perfect time, just as their small pack was forming. Lydia was not an awkward add-on, she entered it on the same conditions and at the time as everyone else. And while Alec hadn't been the biggest fan at first, unsure if she could be trusted fully or if she was after her own agenda, he had come to realize that she was honest, true and strong. After the wedding, Lydia had grown fiercely protective of Isabelle and that was really all Alec could ask for. She also looked at Isabelle with gentle fondness and Alec was hopeful that given a bit time, something true could come of it.

So while Lydia and Isabelle might not be living with the rest of the pack, they still had a room there, because Magnus figured if he made space for everyone in the pack, he should also make room for them. Even though he, and the rest of the pack, understood why Lydia and Isabelle remained at the Institute. They all didn't trust Aldertree and _someone_ needed to keep an eye on the bastard. And Lydia and Isabelle were supposed to be the leaders of the Institute now. They wanted that back.

"Are we going to put that little intervention together today, darling?", asked Magnus softly.

Alec shuddered when he felt Magnus' lips touch down on the Golden Retriever on his right shoulder. It was something instinctual both of them did. Touching the puppy on the other's body. Because the mark was dead, there was no connection, and in a way, touching the mirrored mark on their living mate helped, at least a little bit. Alec shook his head slowly.

"Now's as good a time as any", sighed Alec. "Let's get dressed."

Magnus kissed Alec's neck before the mated pair fully got dressed and headed out of their room. The door to Clary and Simon's room stood ajar a bit, revealing that both of them were still deep asleep. Alec rolled his eyes and opted to ignore them. In his experience, the scent of pancakes alone was enough to summon them both. It was a little amusing, at least.

Though when Alec and Magnus entered the kitchen, they both paused. Jace was already cooking. He had taken to doing that, a lot. And baking too. Elaborate breakfasts, or cookies at night. Jace used it to distract himself from the nightmares, Alec and Magnus knew that. Clary and Simon knew that too. After everything Jace had been through, no one was surprised that Jace had a severe case of PTSD and nightmares. The problem at hand was that Jace refused to accept help, he even refused to _acknowledge_ the problem. He played it down, tried to act strong in front of others. He'd rather choke on his own tears than let others see them. And that was what Alec wanted an intervention about. Actually, Alec and Clary had decided that together. And really, if it was bad enough for Alec and Clary to team up, then it was very serious indeed. Jace was practically wasting away in front of them. He barely slept, the bags beneath his eyes were nearly black, his ribs prominent because even though he cooked a lot, he didn't eat much. He skipped meals, he spent twice as much time in the field than anyone else, relentlessly looking for the Soul Sword and Valentine.

"Good morning, Jonathan", stated Magnus gently as he sat down at the table.

"Morning. Lydia and Izzy aren't here yet?", asked Jace, not turning around to face them.

"No. And Simon and Clary are still asleep too", replied Alec softly.

Alec took a seat next to Magnus and the two of them just stared over at Jace, watching him cook.

/break\

Jace enjoyed lazy breakfasts with the pack. He enjoyed having a pack; a _proper_ pack. The Lightwood family? With mainly betas? Not exactly a proper pack. But with Magnus and Alec and Isabelle and Lydia and Clary and Simon – it felt like a real pack, with strong bonds. Spending time with them all felt reassuring, in a way. Warm. Even though it also hurt, to see those three happily mated couples. One of those couples supposed to be _his_ mates. He shook his head harshly to get the thought out of his mind before it could consume him and drag him down again.

"If I remember this right, we're not just here for the good food", stated Lydia softly.

She had one hand entangled in Isabelle's curls. Isabelle hummed softly as she was leaning against her mate. Lydia provided a calmness in a way that grounded Isabelle like nothing ever had. All the promiscuity and rebelling had mainly been Isabelle's underlying despair. There was no soulmate waiting for her, why should she not enjoy life to its fullest? But now, _finally_ , she had someone who was _hers_ and only hers. Lydia was clever, understanding and gentle in a way Izzy had been seeking.

"Why? You got anything on Aldertree?", asked Jace and perked up.

The pack was laying curled together in the living room after breakfast. Isabelle had her head on Lydia's shoulder and her feet in Alec's lap, while Alec sat between Magnus' legs, leaning back against the warlock's chest. On Magnus' other side sat Simon, with Clary perched on his lap and with her feet in Jace's lap, even though Jace had a few inches between himself and Simon.

"No. We wanted to talk about you, Jonathan", stated Magnus calmly.

Jace stiffened, growing weary. In his experience, it was _never_ good when people wanted to talk about him. He scooted just a little farther away from Simon, from the pack. Clary sighed and reached out for him, noticing how her brother was pulling away.

"What's there to talk about?", sighed Jace. "If it's about laundry, I swear, I have no idea how your pristine white shirt got mixed up in the red and pink pile of clothes. I'll pay for it."

"...We're not having a pack meeting about my shirt. Though it was one of my favorites", chuckled Magnus softly. "This is about your nightmares – and let's skip the part where you try to deny that you're having them, because there are four pairs of healthy ears in this house who can _hear_ you scream at night and each of us has seen you bake or train or even _clean_ at night to occupy yourself."

"Fine. I have nightmares. Are we done talking?", grunted Jace defensively.

"About _what_?", asked Clary, looking at him with those hopeful, large, worried eyes of hers. "Jace, we just... we just want to help you. We're your _family_. We want to help you get better."

"What do you want to hear, Clary?", snorted Jace. "The best of medley of my childhood? How much fun the cruise trip with dear old dad was? Or the vacation trip to the City of Bones? What would be the point of it? The only result would be that you get nightmares too."

"Jace", said Alec, in that longing voice of his, as though Jace was drifting far away from him. "Something must have happened, something very bad, because you've been... you've been driving yourself into the ground and all we want is to help you. Jace, I'm your parabatai, let me help you."

"You can't help me", grunted Jace, crossing his arms over his chest as he got off the couch and started pacing around in the living room. "It's... nothing you can help me with."

"Just tell us, are you really just after revenge? For everything Valentine did to you? Are you chasing him so relentlessly because of that? Because ever since you moved in with Magnus, you've been... you've been so on edge, desperate. Is it about what he did to you on the ship?", asked Isabelle.

"It's not about what he did on the ship", muttered Jace, his jaw clenched, posture stiff.

"We're not stopping until you tell us what's wrong", offered Magnus casually. "Are you chasing Valentine for Valentine's sake, for what he has done to you? Or to find the Soul Sword to redeem yourself in the eyes of the Clave? Allow us to help you, but for that, you need to talk to us."

"It's not... about revenge", sighed Jace, rubbing a hand over his face in an exhausted way.

"Then what is it about?", asked Simon confused, blinking slowly. "Because I was kind of really sure it was revenge for like a shitty childhood and the whole abduction-thing and all?"

Jace gulped hard. He was so exhausted from the past weeks of unsuccessfully trying to find Valentine. And he was just to tired. Still so tired. Tired of fighting it all alone, tired of failing.

"He has something of mine. When I... was on the... the ship, with him, he... told me he has it and he's tried to use it as leverage against me, when using Clary and Alec didn't work", sighed Jace, running his hands slowly over his face as he sat down on the couch opposite the pack. "I thought it was... gone. And I don't _know_ if he told me the truth, if he really... I just have to find him. I _have_ to get it back, if there's a chance. But that's not your problem. It's mine."

"...What does he have on you?", asked Alec, his voice gentle and yet tense, clearly worried.

Jace made the mistake of looking up at his parabatai, seeing the way Alec looked at him, so clearly desperate to help him, to _understand_ him. "He... has my soulmarks."

"Your... what?", sputtered Simon surprised. "But you're a beta! You don't... have soulmarks?"

Jace averted his eyes again, hands kneading each other as he rested his elbows on his knees. "I used to. I wasn't born a beta. I was born an omega. But my father used a warlock, used magic, to remove my soulmarks, because they... could make me any weaker." There was an eerie silence and Jace knew they were all staring at him with pity in their eyes. "I thought they were _gone_ for good, but when I was on the ship, he taunted me, told me he still had them, he could give them back to me, if I would stay loyal to him. I... I don't know if he lied to me, I don't..."

"He didn't lie to you", whispered Magnus gently, yet sounding so loud in the silence surrounding them. "Soulmarks can't be destroyed. They can be moved, yes, but it's... old and forbidden magic, from times when warlocks didn't like that other warlocks had Shadowhunters as soulmates. But this magic has been long forbidden. For one, you would need a parchment of leather made of human skin, because soulmarks are something inherently human. Not to mention that severing a soulbond can permanently damage a soul, leading to death in most cases. But they can not be destroyed."

Jace's head snapped up and he looked at Magnus with the most hopeful expression. He had been so torn, hopeful but also thinking that his father was lying and manipulating him. But if Magnus said that they could not be destroyed, then they were still there. They still existed.

"We're going to help you, Jace. I didn't... I didn't know. We'll help you find them", promised Alec.

Alec looked so hurt. Pained. Because Jace had lied to him? Or because he hadn't noticed that Jace had been hiding this? Was Alec upset with Jace, or with himself for not being able to help his parabatai? Jace felt his heart stutter. He had lied to Alec about _so much_. He got up and returned to pacing nervously, feeling ready to flee the apartment just to get out of this conversation now.

"Alec's right, we will. We will track that asshole down and we'll get your soulmarks back", promised Isabelle, even though she looked hurt that he had lied about being like her, being a beta.

"I doubt Valentine carries them on his person though", mused Lydia with a frown.

"I'm inclined to agree to that, but finding the soulmarks might just be easier than finding Valentine", stated Magnus, looking eager, eyes sparkling golden as he got up. "Your soul animal has a close connection to your soulmarks. So using that, it should be a rather easy spell to find them. All we need is for you to unglamour your soul animal and I'll need to send the Biscuit and Isabelle out to run a few errands for the potion and we would be all set."

Magnus snapped his fingers and Jace shivered as he was suddenly left shirtless, yet he felt as though he was completely naked as they all stared at him, so eager to help, so determined to fix this, to fix him. Alec more so than the others. His parabatai was looking at him as though he wanted to engulf Jace in a tight hug, then bring the soulmarks back as though they could magically fix all that was wrong with Jace – which was a very long list, really. The list was just _too_ long.

He couldn't unglamour his soul animal. Magnus and Alec would _see_ it. And then? What if they didn't find the soulmarks? Alec would probably blame himself for not being able to save the day. Jace _knew_ how good his parabatai was at this – Alec had blamed himself for not finding Jace, for killing Jocelyn. Or worse yet, what if they did find the soulmarks and then Alec and Magnus would realize and they would feel obligated to be with Jace because they shared marks? Jace couldn't bear that. But then again, Jace didn't know what would be worse. Them feeling obligated to be with him because of the soulmarks, or them letting him down gentle because not even the soulmarks would be enough to make them love him? He knew that Magnus and Alec were already perfect together, they didn't _need_ him to mess their relationship up. Jace felt himself slowly slipping into a panic attack caused by the dark swirl of his own thoughts. He shook his head, trying to focus his breathing and his thoughts. He needed this conversation to end.

"No", blurted Jace out, still shaking his head, wrapping his arms nearly protectively around his torso. "Forget it. Forget I said anything. It's stupid."

"W—What?", stuttered Simon surprised. "You can't say stuff like that and then want us to forget! You have soulmarks, out there, but you don't _want_ them? How can you say that?"

Jace scrunched his eyebrows up. "It's... better this way. I don't know why I got that idea in my head to get them back, it's better this way. They're better off this way than being dragged into my mess."

"They're... better off?", echoed Magnus, voice low and disbelieving.

"It doesn't matter. It's been that way now for years, they got used to is", shrugged Jace.

Magnus was out of his seat and right in front of Jace before anyone could blink. The slap that followed stung sharp and earned Magnus a surprised gasp from both Clary and Simon. Jace just blinked sluggishly and lifted a hand to cradle the now aching side of his face.

"How _dare_ you", spat Magnus, eyes feral and golden and _dangerous_. "How dare you think that you have the _right_ to decide that for them. To decide for them that they're better off without you."

Magnus looked ready to slap him again, maybe even punch him, but instead Magnus clawed his fingers into his shirt, right above where Jace had seen the Golden Retriever before on one of the various occasions of him walking in on Alec and Magnus because those two just couldn't keep it in their bedroom. "I know what it feels like to lose your soulmate. For centuries, I lived with two dead soulmarks, no connection, because my soulmates hadn't been born. And when they were born, I felt them come alive and it was the most miraculous feeling ever. And then... then one of them died and I felt it. In all of my very long life, I have never felt anything that painful. And I can still feel that dull pain, the numb ache where my soulmate is supposed to be."

Magnus took a shaky breath, having talked himself into a rage as he stepped away from Jace to keep himself from slapping the blonde again. "If I could have a second chance, I would do _anything_ for it. Out there, somewhere, are your soulmates. And they could have a second chance. How dare you think that you have the right to selfishly take that away from them?! They might not be here, but as someone who knows the pain and grief of losing a soulmate, I will not idly stand by and let you get away with your self-recriminating, self-loathing, self-centered little routine."

"Magnus", hissed Alec angrily, stepping up between Magnus and Jace. "That's _enough_."

Magnus looked ready to argue his mate on this, but when he looked past Alec, he paused. Jace looked appalled, unfocused, plainly shocked as he stared at Magnus with those large eyes of his.

"I... didn't know", whispered Jace hoarsely, backing off from Magnus.

"Of course you didn't. I try _not_ to talk about it. I also try not to think about it, but it doesn't work."

"I—I had no idea...", muttered Jace, eyebrows knitted tightly.

"As I just said-", sighed Magnus, slowly growing more agitated again.

"I thought you would be _fine_. I thought you were fine...", whispered Jace beneath his breath.

"...What?", asked Magnus slowly, his alpha-instincts flaring up with worried protectiveness.

"It... It still hurts you? You still think about it? Even though you have Alec? Why would you?", blurted Jace out, looking so confused and heartbroken. "I thought you were fine..."

"...Jace?", asked Clary, very gently. "Jace, what are you talking about?"

She had also gotten up and was now approaching Jace as though he was a hurt animal. Even Lydia, Isabelle and Simon were now getting up, everyone was looking at Jace so worried, but Jace didn't even notice. He couldn't see past Magnus and Alec. They still felt him? They were still in pain? A numb ache? Because of him? They still thought about him? Even though they had each other?

"Jonathan", said Magnus sharply, back straight as he stared at Jace. "What..."

Jace was still staring at Magnus and Alec, borderline desperately. He wasn't sure what it was. That he hadn't properly slept in weeks, that the pancakes this morning had been the first food he had taken the time to eat in two days because he had been out hunting Valentine, that his pack had actually offered to help him and seemed to be there for him, that Magnus and Alec were _in pain because of him_ , that his soulmarks still existed. It was kind of all a bit too much and Jace felt overwhelmed, overwhelmed with emotions he had been bottling up for too long. And he was still so tired. So tired of hiding and lying and being alone and hurting those he loved. He grabbed his stele with shaky hands, gritting his teeth and closing his eyes tightly as he unglamoured his soul animal.

"I—I'm... sorry", whispered Jace, shaking just a little as he stood and waited.

"...I don't get it ", admitted Simon very confused. "What's going on?"

"It's... that's... that's Alec's second soulmark", whispered Isabelle shocked.

"Wait, what?", sputtered Simon surprised.

"I think this is the moment where the four of us should leave the three of them alone", stated Lydia.

Clary made an agreeing noise, even though she looked ready to grab Jace and pull him into a protective hug. Instead, she went to the kitchen together with Lydia, Isabelle and Simon.

"J—Jace...", stammered Alec, throat dry and tight as he stared at the soul animal at the center of Jace's chest. "Why... Why did you never... never tell me? How did I never... know?"

"We both didn't noticed. We lived together for ten months and we didn't know, but soulmates are supposed to notice it immediately, are supposed t—to look at each other the way you two looked at each other. But there's no bond. We don't _have_ a bond. I thought... I thought you were better off not knowing. And then you met Magnus and I thought... I saw you together and you're perfect together, you didn't need _me_. Magnus didn't even notice me next to you. Why should I mess that up for you? I thought my soulmarks were lost forever, what was the _point_? I thought you two were happy together and don't need me and moved on and I didn't want you to find out, I didn't want to hurt you", rambled Jace out, one hand frantically clawed around his stele, the other balled into a fist next to his body. "I didn't want to hurt you, I thought you deserved better than... _this_ and you're perfect together, without me, I didn't know I was already hurting you. I didn't know the broken bond was still hurting you. I didn't... I always mess things up. I always hurt the people I love. I always... fail."

Alec wrapped his arms around Jace, pulling his parabatai into a tight hug, holding him close while he continued rambling, a flood of things he had kept close to his chest for too long finally released, together with a stream of tears. Alec didn't remember ever seeing Jace cry, not even when Alec would check on Jace after a nightmare. Jace kept apologizing and sobbing into Alec's chest until the blonde fell asleep from sheer exhaustion. Gently, Alec gathered his parabatai in his arms to carry him over to his room. He saw their other pack-mates peeking their heads out of the kitchen curiously, concern written all over their faces. By the time Alec had Jace placed on the bed, Magnus finally caught up with him. The warlock looked dazed and... angry? Alec frowned confused.

"Mag?", asked the archer softly. "What's wrong? You're not... angry at Jace, right? Not after everything he just said. Because I don't know if I can handle this situation with you angry at him, because I _need_ you to back me up with this mess, or otherwise... I don't know..."

"I hit him", whispered Magnus, glaring down at his own hand. "Of... Of all the ways I've dreamed about it somehow not being true, of our third still being alive... hitting him was not... I..."

Oh. Magnus wasn't angry with Jace. He was angry with himself. Alec sighed as he got up and walked over to Magnus, gently grasping the alpha's hands and lifting them up to kiss them.

"You didn't mean to. You didn't know and you hit him for an entirely different reason. Not because he is your mate, but because you were grieving your mate and he was... saying a lot of stupid things", whispered Alec gently before pausing. "Stupid things that Valentine most likely put into his head. Stupid things he must have told himself over and over again to... to keep going."

"I did notice him", whispered Magnus back as they leaned closer and closer. "I noticed you first, yes, of course. But I'm not blind and he's gorgeous. Of course did I notice him. But I... ignored him. Because you're my mate and he was an arrogant, cocky little brat." Magnus paused and took a shaky breath. "...Our mate is an arrogant, cocky little brat who has a _whole lot_ of issues buried underneath all that attitude. He... He genuinely believes those things he said, doesn't he? That you and I are better off without him. I can't believe... I can't believe Valentine got that deep into his head to actually make him think his soulmates would be better off without him."

Alec sighed as he rested his chin on Magnus' shoulder. "Let's... just let him sleep for now and we'll talk when he's awake and calmer. Maybe some time to digest will do us good too, huh?"

Magnus released a humorless laugh as the two of them sat down next to the sleeping blonde.

/break\

Alec was sitting on Jace's bed, reading a book and caressing Jace's hair. Him and Magnus had been staying with Jace for a little while, long enough for Jace to curl together around Alec, arms wound around Alec's waist to cling onto him. So Alec decided to stay, while Magnus seemed too burdened with the thought of the pain Jace must have been going through in the past fifteen years, so Alec had advised the warlock to stay busy. Magnus had gone to research the spell they would need to find Jace's soulmarks and he got to boss Clary, Isabelle and Lydia around to get all the ingredients.

"Hng...", grunted Jace as he slowly woke up, face buried in Alec's stomach.

"Hey there", whispered Alec gently. "How are you feeling, Jace?"

"...Like I bared what little of my soul is left in the most pathetic way possible", muttered Jace.

"It wasn't pathetic, idiot", sighed Alec. "It was... long overdue. You need to stop bottling everything up inside, Jace. All those... things you said. Please, Jace, you need to start opening up. You should have... told me, that you're my soulmate. I think I understand why you didn't, I can't imagine how it must have felt for you to realize that... it... wasn't like in the fairy tales. Seeing me and not feeling that immediate connection. After what I... what I felt when I saw Magnus, really saw him... I _wish_ I would have felt the very same when we met, I wish _you_ would have felt that way." Alec paused, knowing after the soul striptease that Jace had done earlier, maybe it was only fair to be fully truthful with the blonde now. "But... I did fall in love with you, Jace. I fell in love with you hard. I thought I was wrong, I was _broken_ , because... someone with soulmarks should only love their soulmates, right? Not to mention that you... I was supposed to see you as my brother, after my parents took you in. Being in love with you was... wrong on so many levels and I kept beating myself up about it and it only got worse after we became parabatai, because you are not supposed to love your parabatai. Not to mention the pain. I could... I couldn't explain it, the dull feeling, being so cut off from my puppy like that... not feeling him – you – anymore... And when I met Magnus, he explained it, said that our soulmate must be dead and... it made sense, you know? It still hurt, but at least I had some sense of closure... That doesn't mean that Mag and I didn't spend every day mourning _you_ , mourning the soulmate we never got to meet, the soulmate we thought was dead."

Jace had let go of Alec and had turned to lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling as he listened to his parabatai. Jace tilted his head to look up at Alec, silent pain written all over his face, as well as an apology. Alec sighed and reached out to continue running his fingers through Jace's hair.

"I'm sorry, Alec. I thought... I thought they were lost. I thought you would still have our panther and you two could just... just be happy without me. That it'd be way less complicated. Just to... to _forget_ about it all", admitted Jace softly, burying his face in his hands. "But I don't want you and Magnus to feel obligated to do anything just because you happen to have this stupid mutt on your body."

"Don't", interrupted Alec with a rather vicious glare. "Don't you _dare_ talk about _my puppy_ like that. I remember. I remember how it felt as a child, whenever... I felt like I was crushed under the pressure, knowing I would have to become the next head of the Institute, having to care for Isabelle whenever our parents weren't there. I was always working so hard to become better. And when I was overworking myself, I could... feel you both. I could hear Magnus' panther purr soothingly, as though he wanted me to slow down and relax. I could hear your puppy yelp and whine, like it wanted me to play with him instead of working so hard. The puppy was always... gentle and warm and soft. It's not some stupid mutt, not to me. Not to Magnus."

Alec's glare softened as he turned to look at the puppy on Jace's chest. "...Right. Sorry, I guess? It's just... it's been nothing but a pain to me ever since my marks were taken. All it does is feel sad and empty and it's... lonely. It's lonely and that's my fault."

"You do know that not everything in the universe is your fault, right?", drawled Alec, trying for playful. "You don't have to blame yourself for everything. You were a little kid, Jace. How were you supposed to fight? To prevent this? It wasn't your fault. It's Valentine's fault and Magnus and I _will_ rip his spine out for that and shove it up his arse."

"...That is oddly specific", snorted Jace a bit amused.

"Oh yeah. We agreed on that plan", nodded Alec seriously. "It's going to happen for all he has done to you." Alec paused for a brief moment, looking longingly at his parabatai. "Magnus and I talked about adding you to our relationship, you know. Because I love you. And I told Magnus that I love you. He... had a theory, that maybe I had fallen in love with you because of the... lost soulmate. Because our bond was meant for three, because both Magnus and I were meant to love two people. And betas, as we assumed you to be, normally fall for either other betas or for those who had lost a soulmate. So... Magnus agreed that we could give it a try, since he knew how much I love you."

Alec averted his eyes. He could see it on Jace's face, that the blonde didn't believe him. Alec hated himself in that moment, hated himself for bottling his own feelings up for so many years. If he had acted earlier, even just if him and Magnus would have moved their plans along earlier, then maybe Jace wouldn't doubt himself so much. How was Jace supposed to believe that Alec and Magnus wanted him for who he was and not just because they now knew that he shared their soulmarks? All Alec wanted for Jace was to feel loved and find his place. To hear Jace say those things this morning? That he wasn't good enough for his soulmates, that his soulmates were better off without him? It was awful. Alec just wanted to hug Jace and hold him and reassure him.

"How is our puppy, Alexander?"

Both Alec and Jace turned to look at Magnus, who entered the bedroom with a concerned frown on his face. His golden eyes instantly found the wide-awake blonde and the picture of a puppy that adored Jace's chest. Nearly self-conscious, Jace covered the picture and averted his eyes.

"Please... don't do that", requested Alec gently as he grasped Jace's wrist. "Please? We spent so much time longing for... for this puppy, please let us look at it?"

It was completely impossible to deny his parabatai anything when Alec looked at him like that. Slowly, Jace lowered his arms again, staring at his lap thoughtfully. He had honestly no idea what he was supposed to do now. What was going to happen now. He looked up again when Magnus also sat down with them. Mismatched eyes watched him wearily, Jace instinctively leaning more onto Alec, seeking comfort from the other omega. It was kind of natural, considering that Magnus was an alpha and that Magnus _had_ slapped him not long ago. Jace touched the still sore side of his face and watched in mild surprise how Magnus physically flinched away from him and averted his eyes. Jace blinked confused at this, tilting his head and leaning more against Alec.

"What's... What did I do?", asked Jace confused, looking at Alec.

"What?", grunted Alec equally confused, wrapping one arm around Jace to pull him closer.

Jace leaned in to whisper into Alec's ear while watching the warlock who was nearly falling off the bed in his attempt to get as far away from Jace as possible. "He's... avoiding me?" Taking a slightly shaky breath, Jace leaned even more into Alec. "Is it... He doesn't like being _stuck_ with... me."

"What? No. Jace, no", exclaimed Alec surprised, grasping the blonde to pull him closer. "Magnus is not avoiding you because he doesn't like being stuck with you!"

Magnus' head snapped up at those words and he stared at Jace in utter surprise. "What? Jonathan."

Jace frowned at the warlock. "You... looked at me and then you literally _recoiled_ from me."

It was strange to watch the alpha deflate like that, even more so because of an omega. "Jonathan... Jonathan, I didn't mean to flinch away from _you_. You... touched your face. Where I _hit_ you before. I... recoiled from my own actions. I hit you. I hit my soulmate, I hit my _omega_. I..."

"Wha...?", grunted Jace, seemingly even more confused now. "Why?"

"How do you not get it?", sighed Alec, hugging his parabatai closely. "You're our soulmate. That... That means something. We _will_ get your soulmarks back and then you'll get to feel the same kind of connection to us that Magnus and I feel for each other. But even without it, I do love you. And even without it, Magnus feels like shit for slapping you, because an alpha's duty is to protect and cherish their omegas. You're his omega. He cares about you. He cared about you even before you revealed your soul animal to us. Jace, please..."

"I'm sorry I hit you, sweetheart", tried Magnus, looking at the blonde pleadingly.

"It's okay", grunted Jace, still with the confused frown adoring his features. "I've had worse? I mean, seriously. Even Clary has a harder slap than you do, Mag."

"That... is beside the point", sighed Magnus, by now looking a little resigned. "I didn't..."

"Can we like stop talking about this now?", requested Jace exhausted, leaning forward to snuggle into Alec's chest. "Please? I'm tired. This was... kind of exhausting."

"Of course. Sleep some, Jace", agreed Alec, trying to wiggle out from beneath the blonde.

"...Can you... stay...?", asked Jace softly, fingers curled into Alec's shirt.

"I'll... leave you to it, Jonathan", muttered Magnus and awkwardly got off the bed.

"...Oh... Uhm, okay...", nodded Jace, looking down at his hands.

"Magnus", called Alec out curiously as he watched his parabatai fold in on himself. "I don't think Jace meant just me. He meant us. You two _need_ to learn to communicate with each other."

"I...", started Magnus slowly, turning to look at Jace. "Jonathan, do you want me to stay?"

"If... you wanna stay, yeah", nodded Jace slowly, biting his lower lip. "I just... wanna sleep for like the next thirty hours or so and feel... safe. I... feel that way when I'm with you guys."

"Both of us?", asked Magnus a bit surprised, sitting down again.

"Dude. I moved in with you. I wouldn't have done that if I didn't feel _safe_ with you", grunted Jace and rolled his eyes before he blushed just a little. "Besides... you... uh... you _are_ my alpha. I guess I just kinda _want_ to feel safe with you. Can we _please_ stop talking now?"

He groaned exhausted. Admitting to all those feelings earlier had really drained him. He just wanted to sleep. He didn't want to think about feelings and much less talk about them. He wanted to sleep and to feel safe. Alec felt safe. Alec's always felt safe. Magnus felt safe too. Sighing softly, Jace mushed his face even more into Alec's chest as he laid down more comfortable. Tentatively, Magnus laid down on Jace's other side and very carefully laid one arm over Jace's waist.

"Rest", whispered Magnus gently. "And once you're well-rested, we will find your soulmarks. Together. Because we're in this together, Jonathan. You're... ours."

Despite himself, Jace sighed at that. He knew it was ridiculous. He _knew_ even his soulmarks wouldn't change anything. Alec and Magnus were happy and perfect. It would end their pain, that ache Magnus had mentioned, but it wasn't going to change the way they felt for him. They didn't feel for Jace as they felt for each other and that wouldn't change. But that was okay.

/break\

Jace still felt tired by the time he woke up and kind of even more tired by the time Magnus went through his whole magic-spell thing. He had dismissed Jace after fifteen minutes already and told him that from here on out, the warlock would have to work on the tracking spell alone and that Jace should maybe take another nap. Napping wasn't what Jace had in mind, because his mind was also buzzing even though it was tired. He had so many thoughts running through his head, so he went and got himself a drink before curling together on the patio among Magnus' cats.

"How are you doing, Jace?", asked Clary gently as she sat down next to him.

"Because you look like shit", supplied Isabelle as she took his other side.

"I'm _fine_ ", spat Jace irritated as his sisters crowded in on him.

"Sure doesn't look like that", grunted Isabelle and rolled her eyes.

"You never told _anyone_?", asked Clary, voice soft and worried as she nudged him. "I mean, about having your soulmarks taken away from you? About Alec being your soulmate?"

"No", grunted Jace defensively. "Who should I have told? Izzy, who was staring up at me so adoringly because she never met another beta before? Robert and Maryse, who held Michael Wayland high up on a pedestal? How was I supposed to take that from them and make them believe it, believe that the guy they trusted was an abusive asshole? I sure as fuck couldn't tell Alec."

"But why not?", wanted Clary to know, frowning a little. "Alec is your soulmate. Why didn't you tell him that? You could have worked through this together?"

"He's an omega too", shrugged Jace with a frown. "I... I figured they'd do better without me. An alpha and an omega. And... Valentine told me... that soulmates make you weaker. He told me so often that they're better off without me, because having two soulmates is just _wrong_. And that I'd be better off without them, because they made me weak."

"How did they make you weak? You were just a child. You didn't even know them", asked Isabelle.

"They... comforted me", whispered Jace softly, leaning against Isabelle some. "When... Whenever he smacked me around after I disappointed him, to 'toughen me up', I could... I could _hear_ my panther purring soothingly and I could _feel_ my snow owl's soft feathers caressing me... They made me... made me feel safe when I was scared. Guess that's why he took them away from me, because part of me..." Jace paused and took a shaky breath. "Part of me was always looking forward to when things would get better. Part of me always pictured that... one day, my snow owl would sweep me away and my black panther would growl at anyone who'd dare try to hurt us and protect us." Jace sighed softly and grimaced. "Guess it was the safest way to keep me under his thumb by removing any chance at a happy future, a happy future far away from him..."

He startled a little as he was hugged tightly from both sides. The smallest smile found its way onto Jace's lips as his sisters clung onto him tightly. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around them both and pulled them closer. This was good. Deep down, very deep down, he knew that it was something he should need. After all, he was an omega. Omegas sought out physical contact and comfort from the pack like neither betas nor alphas did. Jace was used to being used for cuddles by Alec; Jace, Max and Izzy had regularly formed puppy-piles for Alec. He had always wondered what it'd be like to have those urges too. For physical contact. Then again, he kind of did. He was just too afraid to admit them or to actively seek someone out, because he had been taught not to, while other omegas – _real_ omegas – were encouraged to follow their instincts.

"Jonathan, if... you could, everything is ready. All we need now is you and then we'll see where the magic will lead us", announced Magnus tentatively, sounding reluctant.

There was great pain in his eyes as he looked at Jace and Jace knew the warlock had heard what he had just confided in his sisters. Sighing frustrated, Jace wiggled out of the hugs to face the music. Best get this over with. Once they'd fail, they could just forget about all of this and return to regular business again. There was no way they'd be able to find his soulmarks, or put them back on again.

/break\

Being back in his childhood home _hurt_. There were too many memories. Jace found himself clinging onto Alec's hand as they made their way to Michael Wayland's office. Alec had this soothing, soft aura of an omega, calming Jace down at least a little.

He couldn't believe it when they found it in his father's safe in his father's office. Then again, he guessed that back here was the safest place to keep them because Valentine could hardly carry them around at all times. Still, that they had been this close all this time. His hands were shaking as he unrolled the parchment of leather, revealing his soulmarks. He could practically feel them calling for him as he held them so close and his panther was staring at him longingly.

"Mine...", whispered Jace softly, voice dripping with longing. "T—They're... _mine_."

"Yes, they are", assured Alec gently. "And now let's get back home and let Magnus put them back where they belong, Jace. Come on, it's alright, puppy."

Jace flushed only mildly at the nickname, but he was way too focused on his soulmarks. He hugged them very close and barely noticed anything around him, not even how they made their way back to the loft. All he could think about was that he had _his soulmarks_. They truly, really weren't destroyed. They were here. With him. And if anyone could put them back where they belonged, it would be Magnus. Jace knew Magnus could give him his soulmarks back. He jerked a little in surprise when he was maneuvered to sit down on the couch by Alec.

"...Is he okay?", asked Lydia concerned while Isabelle crouched down in front of Jace.

"I think he's just overwhelmed. He thought they were gone for so long and now he's actually holding them and is short of getting them back for good", replied Alec, voice dark and soft.

"Jonathan, do you need some time?", asked Magnus gently as he sat down next to Jace.

"No", spat Jace out, holding the leather tight. "I—I want them back. I thought I could be fine if I ignored them, but now I have them so close and I _miss them_."

"Okay, it's okay, sweetheart", assured Magnus softly. "Just... give them to me and lay down and... it's going hurt _a lot_. Just take deep breaths, okay?"

Jace slowly handed them over and laid down on the couch. He was mildly aware of Magnus ordering the others around to prepare things to sooth him and his inevitable pain. The pain was overwhelming, though not as bad as he remembered from when they had been taken away from him. It was still enough to make him pass out as the soulmarks burned back onto his hip-bones.

/break\

Alec had been crying. He hadn't cried that hard since he had felt his puppy's connection disappear. Back then, he had felt like his panther was curling around him to protect him. Right now, he had Magnus physically curled around him, clinging onto him, soothing him. Even though Alec could feel the dampness where Magnus was crying into Alec's shoulder.

"I can feel him", gasped Alec for the tenth time, nails digging into Magnus' biceps. "I can feel him again. It's like he's wagging his tail and jumping around happily. It's... He's _back_."

"I know. I know", whispered Magnus also for the tenth time. "I can feel it too. I can feel him too."

The two of them had been sitting next to the passed-out Jace on their bed, where they had brought him after the procedure was over. The blonde had at least finally relaxed and fallen into a calm kind of sleep, after the all-consuming pain had passed. When the magic had worked, Jace hadn't been the only ones overwhelmed. Both Magnus and Alec felt the connection to their puppy come back. Warmth and love flooded them and they felt their puppy, who had only been motionless and cold for the past fifteen years, felt as though their happy little puppy was back and running around excitedly while wagging his tail. Once the intensity ebbed off and the two opened their eyes again and went on to check on Jace, the next thing hit them. It felt like when they had first met and looked at each other. Magnus and Alec were left breathless as they looked at Jace and felt as though the world around them fell completely apart, leaving nothing but the three of them.

"Ca—an... you two sob quieter...? Trying to... recover from being run over by a herd of elephants and a couple trains...? Fuck, my head feels like it exploded", groaned Jace, voice hoarse.

Magnus' breath hitched as he looked at the blonde. It would be intense for the first couple of days to just look at Jace. Just like it had been when he had first met Alec. It was as though Jace was glowing. Not to mention that Jace _smelt_ like an omega now. He smelt like an omega and Magnus could feel the pull to scoop his omega up and protect him and cherish him.

Though while Magnus was good enough at keeping those urges at bay, Alec wasn't. Alec was completely stomped by the intensity. He had been in love with Jace for so many years now, but right now his feelings felt even more amplified. Jace was so gorgeous and beautiful and _his_. Alec growled darkly, possessively, before he crawled up to curl around the blonde, nosing at Jace's scent-glands and inhaling that beautiful, mesmerizing, delicious omega-scent he had never smelt before. Honey, milk and strawberries. It was mouth-watering and Alec wanted to surround himself with it.

"Uhm... Alec?", grunted Jace confused by the tight hug and the nuzzling.

Though then he opened his eyes to look doubtfully at his parabatai and all he saw was Alec. Like the room around them just faded out of existence. There was a glow around Alec, like a halo. And Alec's scent was way more alluring than ever before. Instead of asking Alec what the heck he was doing, Jace simply followed that same instinct and curled together against Alec, purring softly.

"How are you feeling? Are you still in pain, sweetheart?", asked Magnus, voice gentle.

Jace opened his mouth to answer as he turned enough to look at the warlock, but he choked on the unspoken words when he actually looked at Magnus. It was just like looking at Alec. Everything fell apart around Magnus, leaving the warlock with a curious blue glow around himself like a king of hell ascending still surrounded by hell's fire. It was even more intense than looking at Alec, which might just be biology calling because Jace was an omega and Magnus was his alpha. It was only natural for an omega to seek out and feel drawn to their alpha. The warlock, who already was naturally ridiculously pretty, seemed to be even more gorgeous in that moment and he smelt so dark and rich and divine. Jace just wanted to grab Alec, drag his omega along so both of them could curl together on top of that alpha like they should and never-ever leave this bed again.

For the very first time in his life did Jace feel _complete_ and at home. All he could do was croon high-pitched and eagerly reach out for Magnus, which was a little harder with the archer latched onto him and hugging him so tightly, wiggling out was not an option.

"Hey, sh, it's alright", whispered Magnus gently as he crawled up to them.

He carefully wrapped his arms around Jace and pulled the blonde up against his chest. Jace practically melted as he was sandwiched between his soulmates, flooded by their warmth.

"How about we just stay right here for like forever?", suggested Jace sluggishly.

"That sounds like the best plan ever", grunted Alec, face pressed against Jace's neck. "Mag?"

"I completely agree", hummed Magnus contently, burying his nose in Jace's hair. "Oh heaven, you smell delicious. Like milk and honey and strawberries. I'm getting hungry here."

"You and me both", huffed Jace and rolled his eyes as he sniffed Alec's wrist. "He smells like vanilla and apples and cinnamon. He smells really yummy. I mean, I could smell him being sweet and kinda vanilla even before, but now I can smell him way more."

"You didn't smell at all", whispered Alec longingly, inhaling deeply. "All those years of missing out on that scent. Mh, you smell so good, I just want to eat you up..."

"Hey! No biting!", yelped Jace startled as Alec did bite Jace's neck.

"Right. Sorry. Just... by the Angel, I have wanted you for so long and just holding you and finally smelling you like that, it's kind of hard not to just bite and claim and never let you get away again", admitted Alec a bit embarrassed, blinking to clear his head. "It's like... like I'm high on you."

"Ye—eah, same", groaned Jace, rubbing his cheek against Magnus' chest. "Do you know Mag smells like something I wanna climb and ride like _right now_?"

Both Magnus and Alec made choking noises at that and stared at Jace with comically wide eyes. It took the blonde a moment to notice their stares. Somehow, that shook the haze off some and Jace awkwardly sat up, cheeks turning red as he ruffled his hair.

"Right. That was too much", grunted Jace self-consciously. "We're not even... Sorry."

"Not... too much, per se, just a bit of a... ah, surprise", assured Magnus gently, though it was impossible to hide how wide his pupils were as he stared at the omega. "You want to... climb me?"

"Well, I mean, Alec's better suited for climbing since he's literally a beanstalk, but yeah", shrugged Jace, causing Alec to blush furiously. "I've... known you're my soulmates for a while now. Of course did I think about... stuff. With you guys. Not just sex-stuff. Also... relationship-stuff... But you didn't and I get that and yeah. I'm going back to my room to sleep off the magic hangover."

With those words, Jace practically fled the room to head to his own. Magnus heaved a deep sigh as he stared after the blonde. Alec made a displeased noise and snuggled up to Magnus.

"What do we do to convince him that we wanted to offer him to join our relationship _before_ this whole mess started?", asked Magnus with a concerned frown. "How do we do that? You're my Jace-expert. Tell me what we need to say to make him believe us."

"Well, your personal Jace-expert is at a loss too", sighed Alec, kissing the puppy on Magnus' chest. "But we're both smart. We'll figure something out, together."

/break\

Embarrassingly enough, they did _not_ figure the solution out on their own. It was Lydia who did. Three days later, with very much avoidance from Jace and complete exasperation and despair from both Alec and Magnus. It happened while Jace was on a mission with Isabelle and Clary and while Magnus had a meeting with Meliorn, Luke and Raphael trying to soothe away some of the Downworlders' worries concerning the still missing Soul Sword. Lydia had cornered Alec and ordered him to go out for drinks to talk some. And even though Alec wasn't too much of a fan of drinking, it did help in this instance and Lydia had become a very close friend of his.

"So, he's been dodging you ever since he got his soulmarks back", summed Lydia up.

"Not exactly", sighed Alec and took a very big gulp from his drink (after dating Magnus for a certain while, he had at least found a cocktail he liked. A Strawberry Batida, because it tasted the way he imagined Jace and Magnus to taste in combination). "He was... seeking us out, when he first woke up. We were curled together on his bed, just... cuddling. But then something happened and he bolted out. He's been avoiding us since then, because he... He basically admitted to wanting us both and thinking that _we_ don't want him. We already tried telling him that we do, that we did even before we knew about the soulmarks. Tried it multiple times at this point. There's just no way to convince him that that's true... He keeps believing we're only saying that now, either out of pity for him or because we now feel the pull of the soulmarks. Which we do, the pull I mean. Every time I see him, I want to grab him and lock him up in our bedroom, simply curling together around him and preventing him from ever leaving again. An urge which has become increasingly more problematic, because... it's been three days now and he's been dodging us..."

There was mild amusement dancing in Lydia's eyes as she watched him. "I understand. Well, not completely. When I first met my omega, everything fell apart around him and we were immediately pulled together. It's not exactly the same with Isabelle, but we've formed a strong bond at this point. I can't imagine being avoided by my mate. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, thanks", sighed Alec frustrated. "I'm open to suggestions, you know. Anything at this point."

Lydia sipped her wine and frowned thoughtfully for a moment. "Have you and Magnus actually had a conversation about including Jace in your relationship prior to the soulmarks disaster?"

"Yeah, we did. Multiple ones, actually", muttered Alec, ruffling his own hair.

"Then show him one", offered Lydia casually, making Alec frown in confusion. "Isabelle told me about that debacle with the memory-demon that led to the first big outfall between you and Jace. Can't Magnus work a little magic to show Jace one of your memories?"

Alec frowned for a long stretch. "That... That is actually a really good idea..."

/break\

Jace was exhausted and strained by the time he got home from his latest mission with Clary and Isabelle. It kind of sucked being on missions without Alec. He missed his parabatai, his other half. But he just couldn't stand being in the same room as Alec or Magnus at the moment. Smelling them or looking at them made Jace want to crawl into either of their laps and kiss them silly. And then do something a little less innocent. Honestly, at this point just one look from Magnus' intense golden eyes and Jace wanted to roll onto his back and bare his neck and stomach to the alpha. The warlock was funny and wicked, it was really not hard to picture submitting to this alpha.

"Hello, Jace. Good night, Jace", greeted Simon as he grabbed Clary and pulled her into a kiss. "We are having dinner in Rome. Weekend trip included, sponsored by our local High Warlock."

Clary blinked surprised and looked over Simon's shoulder to look suspiciously at Magnus and Alec who were both sitting on the couch. Magnus locked eyes with her and gave her a look. She understood and smiled brightly before turning around and pecking Jace's cheek. The blonde looked suspicious as Clary and Simon left through a portal, leaving Jace alone with Magnus and Alec.

"You will _not_ run away and hide", stated Alec very firmly, glaring. "You'll stay right here and _talk_ to us. No more running and hiding, all it does is hurt. And if it's hurting me and Magnus, it must be hurting you too, so what exactly was the point of getting your soulmarks back if all you plan on doing with them is hide away and hurt us all in the process, Jace?"

"I don't... I just...", Jace grunted and ran his fingers through his hair.

"We know you're avoiding us because you think we only seek you out now due to the soulmarks. So you will sit that perfect little ass of yours down right now and let us show you how wrong you are", stated Magnus, as firmly as Alec. "Oh, no time to blush even though it looks utterly alluring on you, honey. No, what I meant was that we want to share a memory with you."

"What?", asked Jace confused as he reluctantly approached them.

"A memory", repeated Magnus with a mischievous grin. "You keep deflecting whenever we try to tell you that we wanted you before you revealed your soul animal to us. So, we are going to prove that, by pulling a shared memory of mine and Alexander's from our minds and showing you."

Jace wanted to protest, but Magnus and his magic were faster than him and then he found himself watching what looked like a found footage video taking place in Alec's and Magnus' bedroom. The mated pair was half-naked and curled together, Alec resting his head on Magnus' chest.

" _Have... you thought any more about my proposal, Alexander?_ ", inquired memory Magnus.

" _I don't see the point in it, Mag_ ", sighed memory Alec, absentmindedly tracing the puppy mark on Magnus' chest. " _I appreciate that you contemplate including Jace in our relationship. But... I mean, he's not interested in me. Why would he want to be with both of us?_ "

" _Have you seen us? We're gorgeous. You and I surely can convince him we're a wonderful idea_ ", chimed memory Magnus happily, playing with memory Alec's hair. " _He's gorgeous and sweet, even though he's pretty good at covering it up with being a cocky brat. I do find his cheekiness amusing and whenever you two bicker, it's highly entertaining._ " Memory Magnus paused for a second and pressed a kiss to memory Alec's forehead. " _But we do have to work some things out before I feel fully comfortable courting him. He doesn't even trust us, or the pack, to share his fears. Until we make him talk about his nightmares, it would feel too much like taking advantage of him while he is being vulnerable and defenseless and that does not sit right with me and I know it doesn't sit right with you either, darling. So I was thinking we could stage an intervention for him._ "

" _Sure_ ", snorted memory Alec. " _Why not. I've tried everything else already._ "

Magnus and Alec, the real ones, were watching with sharp eyes how Jace processed the conversation he had just witnessed. Mismatched eyes widened as he watched. Even though Jace tried to deny it, he couldn't. This was a memory, this wasn't just their words. This wasn't just them telling him that they had thought about adding him to their relationship, words that could just be meant to reassure him or be spoken in pity. No, this was a conversation that Magnus and Alec had days, maybe even weeks, before he had revealed his soul animal to them.

"You... You really...?", asked Jace softly, looking longingly at Alec and Magnus.

"Yes, Jace. Really. A lot", nodded Alec, gently grasping Jace's hands to pull them close. "Please."

Jace turned to look at Magnus quizzically, unsure. The alpha purred softly as he scooted closer until he could press the gentlest kiss on Jace's lips, leaving the blonde pleasantly flustered. Alec huffed and pushed past their alpha to also kiss Jace, though Alec's kiss was deeper than Magnus'.

"You're our soulmate, Jonathan", whispered Magnus gently. "And I think that all the years you and Alexander spent so close with each other, you managed to form a bond of your own, even without the soulbond. It's what made Alexander fall in love with you."

Jace found himself leaning in, chasing after Alec as his parabatai pulled away from him. Alec grinned pleased as he leaned farther away, until Jace was practically laying on top of Alec's chest. The archer's grin turned mischievous as he wrapped his arms around Jace's waist and pulled the blonde flush against himself. Magnus watched them with sparkling and delighted eyes, enjoying the way the two omegas looked curled together like this. It was only natural, that omegas were very affectionate with each other; mated omegas even more so. Alec was nuzzling into Jace's neck, drinking in the scent and warmth of their mate who had been avoiding them for the past three days.

"How about we move this little cuddle-fest to the bedroom so I can have some puppy-cuddles too?"

Jace and Alec both actually looked guilty as they turned toward Magnus, like they had forgotten about him for a moment. Magnus rolled his eyes at them, though he smiled sweetly when Jace came crawling over to kiss him again, this time deeper and slower than before. Pleased, Magnus wrapped his arms around Jace and lifted the blonde up to carry him to the bedroom. Jace made a cute surprised sound – what had the blonde been thinking, that those upper arms were only for show?

"W—What the hell, Mag?", grunted Jace flustered, clinging tightly onto the warlock.

"Gotta show you who the alpha is in this relationship", growled Magnus playfully.

"Mh... I think I like that", mused Alec with dark eyes as he watched and followed.

Jace huffed when he was dumped on Magnus' and Alec's bed. He couldn't believe this was happening. He had his soulmarks back. He had his soulmates. His soulmates _wanted_ him. He could feel his cheeks heating up when Magnus and Alec both took off their shirts and even though his eyes wanted to roam over the sixpacks and pecks, all he could focus on were their soul animals. His soulmarks, right there in the center of their chests. So beautiful. He reached out for them on instinct, laying one hand on Alec's chest and one on Magnus'. Both shuddered at the contact, but laid their own hands on top of his, as though they tried to keep him in place.

"...Mine", whispered Jace very softly, the single word dripping with a possessive need.

The hand on Magnus' chest wandered up to touch his puppy above Magnus' heart. The touch sent an intense shudder up and down Magnus' spine and he gripped Jace's wrist even tighter.

"Yes, yours, sweetheart", assured Magnus, voice dark. "Can... we see yours?"

"Mh...?", grunted Jace a bit confused, too busy tugging on Alec's arm to turn him over so he could also look at the puppy on Alec's shoulder. "...Use clearer words. Brain's distracted, there's two hot half-naked guys standing in front of me, no capacity left to concentrate."

Magnus laughed amused and Alec snorted. The archer obediently turned his back on Jace so Jace could take a proper look at the soulmarks on Alec's shoulder-blades. Jace hummed pleased and leaned in to place a kiss on the Golden Retriever, making Alec gasp surprised.

"Your soulmarks", grunted Alec after a long moment. "Can we see them? We haven't... seen them yet. You were wearing a shirt when Magnus performed his magic, you know."

"Oh. Right", grunted Jace doe-eyed after a moment. "You just wanna get me shirtless."

"That, too", nodded Magnus lightly as he sat down on the bed.

Jace chuckled amused as he got off the bed and grasped his shirt to pull it over his head. After tossing it on the ground, Jace slowly turned toward them again, cheeks flushed as he ducked his head in mild embarrassment. Alec all the while had sat down next to Magnus. Both of them stared with wide eyes and slightly open mouths at Jace as they saw their respective soul animal curled on Jace's hipbones. Jace very slowly ran his hands over them before hooking his fingers into the loops of his belt and pulled them down just a little. Magnus downright purred at that, flustering Jace with a certain sense of pride at that. His breath hitched as Alec latched onto him – literally latched onto him by kissing the snow owl on Jace's left hip-bone. Jace's knees buckled a little when Alec sucked a hickey on it. Magnus got him though, gently guiding Jace to sit with them on the bed.

"I missed them _so much_ ", whispered Jace as he curled against Magnus' side, sitting down more comfortably so Alec could continue with the hickey. "I... I missed feeling them. I missed feeling _you_. Fuck, they feel so safe and warm and... I feel so... complete with them."

"We know, sweetheart", murmured Magnus while kissing along Jace's shoulders. "It's the same for us. Sure, Alexander and I had each other, but we couldn't feel you. Feeling you again... it... I thought I would _never_ feel my precious little puppy again, but to have it back – and to have you..."

Jace groaned and bared his neck as the alpha kept nibbling it. He could feel himself growing harder as he felt the attention of both his mates on his body like this. A whimper escaped Jace's lips as Alec started palming him through the jeans. Jace bucked up into the contact, his nails clawing into Alec's hair. Magnus' nimble fingers started playing with the button of Jace's jeans, slowly.

"Sweet little puppy", whispered Magnus gently. "Would you... be okay with... more...?"

"Clearer words. Brain mush", groaned Jace as Alec's hand brought him closer to completion.

"Sex", grunted Alec as he reluctantly let go of Jace's hip-bone. "He means sex. Are you okay with us having sex already? Because... barely seeing you and _not touching you at all_ in the past three days, since we _saw_ you, for the first time when you got your soulmarks back, and the bond started forming... it's been driving Mag and me up the wall. I just want to touch and kiss and devour you, Jace. Shit. I've never been that desperate to touch you, Jace. I _need_ you."

"Ye—es", groaned Jace, bucking up into Alec's touch, nails scratching down Alec's arms. "Yes, yes, yes, fuck, I wanted you to fuck me _for years_ , Alec. I—I... wanted this for so long. Having my... soulmates. Having a place... with them. With... you. Can we just... finalize the matebond? Because then... no one can take this away from me. We can do the dating and stuff afterward, I just need to _know_ that you're really, truly mine, please."

Magnus let go of Jace's jeans and snapped his fingers, effectively making all the clothes left on their bodies disappear. A relieved, shaky sigh escaped Jace's lips as his cock was freed from the jeans. Alec's long, calloused fingers cunningly wrapped around it right away, gently caressing it for a couple of strokes. Magnus leaned down to kiss Jace deeply, practically tongue-fucking the blonde's mouth. Jace moaned into the kiss, melting beneath the alpha and reaching with one hand up to tug on Magnus' hair, other hand buried in Alec's hair, holding onto both of his soulmates.

"F—Fuck", growled Jace when him and Magnus parted their kiss because Magnus was slipping a finger into the blonde. "S—Shit. Fuck. Ma—ag. Fuck. _Yes_."

The warlock smirked like a maniac as he added a second finger, enjoying the warm, slick feeling of the omega's hole, wiggling around and scissoring his mate. Alec all the while moved his lips down to engulf Jace's cock and at the sensation of Alec's mouth around his dick and Magnus' fingers brushing against his prostate, the blonde downright howled. Alec and Magnus exchanged an amused look and silently agreed that tonight, they would claim their omega and they would make Jace fall apart for them, show him just how much they truly wanted him.

"Alexander, would you like to go first?", offered Magnus generously.

"You really have to ask?", grunted Alec, voice dark and rough. "Scoot over, alpha. This is mine."

Magnus chuckled delighted as he pulled out of Jace, making the blonde omega whimper a little. Magnus shushed him gently, peppering Jace's face with kisses while running his hands over Jace's torso to trace delicious abs. Alec grasped Jace's thighs to lift his legs up and ease his way into the other omega. Cussing beneath his breath at the feeling of Jace's tight warmth around his dick, Alec reached out for Magnus and pulled the warlock into a passionate, hungry kiss.

"I take it, our sweet little puppy feels good?", teased Magnus amused, resting a hand in Alec's neck.

Alec groaned beneath his breath, leaning into his alpha's touch. "Ye—es. _So_ good. Look at that pretty puppy of ours. Shit, you look gorgeous like this, Jace."

"Like what? Sexually frustrated because my mate won't _fuck_ me?", growled Jace with a glare.

Alec rolled his eyes and then his hips, electing a drawn-out moan from the blonde. Alec was embarrassed, he would love to draw this out, to fuck Jace for hours, but he was way too excited and Jace felt just too good and this was his first time topping, his first time feeling this tight, warm heat. It only took Alec a couple of thrusts before he came inside Jace, far too overwhelmed by the situation in total. Groaning, Alec bent over Jace to bite the left side of the blonde's neck and mark his mate while filling the other omega with his cum. Once Alec gently eased his teeth out of the sensitive neck and his cock out of the blonde's ass, Alec found himself pulled down so Jace could now bite the unmarked side of his neck and mark the archer as _his_. Pleased and dazed, Alec collapsed next to Jace. Though unlike the dark-haired Shadowhunter, Jace was not yet done. He spread his legs invitingly for the warlock, giving the alpha a pointed look.

"You said Alec can go first. That implies a second round. Gimme that", growled Jace.

"Demanding. What is it with me and getting demanding omegas?", chuckled Magnus amused.

Not that Magnus wasn't more than willing to obey and fuck the blonde too. He was dying to claim his second omega and knot the blonde. While Magnus eased his way in, spreading Jace more with his alpha-cock than Alec had, Alec crawled over to wrap his lips around Jace's dick once more. Magnus didn't wait long, fucking Jace deep and hard within a few couple of thrusts.

"My, you're right, darling. Our sweetheart does feel great", grinned Magnus teasingly.

He locked eyes with Jace, watching the pleasure roll over the blonde in waves as Magnus spread him wide, as Alec sucked him deep. Not to mention the additional pleasure of at least one sealed matebond. And oh, Magnus could not wait to get his teeth on that pretty, pale neck himself.

"Fu—uck, Alec, I'm going to... I'm...", groaned Jace hoarsely.

All Alec did was tease Jace even more, running his tongue over the tip of Jace's cock until the blonde spilled inside Alec's mouth. The archer swallowed most of it, though not all of it. Instead, he pulled off the blonde's cock and sat up to pull Magnus into a deep kiss, sharing the taste of their blonde. Magnus groaned into the kiss, automatically picking up the pace as he had Jace's taste spreading on his tongue. The alpha's knot was slowly swelling, so he thrust harder, forcing the swollen knot in before it reached its peak. The stretch made Jace whimper in a broken way that sounded decidedly too beautiful to Magnus. The blonde omega laid sprawled out, spent and exhausted on the bed, waiting for his alpha to come and knot him. Which Magnus did, only moments later, filling the blonde with his seed and locking them together as his knot reached its full size, stretching Jace's hole obscenely wide and preventing Magnus from pulling out. Not that the warlock wanted to pull out. While he came, Magnus leaned in to bite and mark his omega. A cute, content sound came from Jace before the blonde placed his own mark on Magnus.

"How do you feel, sweetheart?", asked Magnus, voice low and soft as he carefully adjusted them.

He laid down behind Jace, very mindful of his knot locking them together. Alec very eagerly pulled Jace to rest his head on the archer's chest. Gently, Alec started kissing Jace's forehead.

"...Complete", whispered Jace beneath his breath, smiling to himself. "I can... feel you. Even more than just the soulmarks, I can feel that you guys are... happy and sated and tired."

Jace blinked, trying to blink away the tears forming in his eyes. He felt complete, yes, more so than before when the bond had started forming as he had looked at Alec and Magnus. But it was so much more than just that, he felt like he was home, for the first time in his life. He felt warm and safe and loved and like _no one_ would ever be able to take that away from him again.

"Hey, sh, it's okay", whispered Magnus gently as he noticed the tears.

"Yeah, I know", chuckled Jace, burying his face in Alec's neck. "It's... That's why. For... For the first time, I feel like I _belong_. And like _no one_ can take this away from me again."

"And no one can, Jace", grunted Alec, caressing Jace's hair. "No one's ever going to take you away from me and Magnus again. And together, we're going to stop that bastard and put him down for good so he'll _never_ be able to hurt you again. Right, Magnus?"

"Absolutely", agreed Magnus softly, kissing Jace's neck. "You're safe with us, my precious puppy."

_~*~ The End ~*~_

**Author's Note:**

> Writing this was insane fun. You do know how much I love hurting Jace. Damn, this one hurt. But hey, it also hurt Alec and Magnus, so there's that! :D
> 
> I just think that Valentine is enough of a bastard that in an ABO-verse, he so would try to turn Jace from an omega to something "more useful".
> 
> I'm normally not too big of a fan of soulmate AUs because, in my opinion, it takes away the whole appeal of them falling in love, because... you see it and it clicks and that's it. Boring. Which is why I wanted to play with the whole soulmark thing a bit in my first soulmate AU by removing Jace's~


End file.
